If anyone wonders where the devil has been hiding all these years, I have an answer for you. It’s in my house, and has assumed the form of my sewing machine. The Brother VX-1125 was meant to make my life easier, freeing my right hand from the crank of the 1895 Jones Family, and allowing me to zig-zag stitch my way along the edge of fraying fabric. In actual fact, what has happened since I made the switch from Victorian engineering to modern plastic piffle, is that my sewing-life has become a series of tension related stresses, coupled with frustration at the machine’s inability to sew even stitches for longer than 3 inches at a time.

If anyone has any kind of sewing machine – which isn’t inherently evil – that they no longer have a use for, I would gladly drive many miles to collect it. I’d even let you join me in the sacrificial burning of this terrible monstrosity. Alternatively, if you happen to have a Brother VX-1125 and would either like to give me some pointers on how I can tame the beast, or would like to join me in the burning, then feel free to get in touch.

Oh yes, and Mum? Those nice striped curtains which you gave me? One of them is now in a small ball of tangle-thread on the living room floor. The other is stuck somewhere in the bowels of the devil machine, never to be seen again. Sorry.  😦

Advertisements